I have been reading a lot over the last few years about simple living and minimalism. There are many articles out there with some brilliant voices to make you think. Basically, these are the points that have stuck with me:
- Our actions follow our heart. The simple questions are What do you believe? What do you value? I’ve worked like crazy over a bunch of my life. The money and what I have learned has been great. What if there is something else? Is the pursuit of more money worth it? What if I juggled less, had less stress, and maybe more freedom for what matters. I have always been an environmentalist even when I was 7 and sent a letter to Jimmy Carter about our use of plastic (at that time plastic was replacing glass). Am I really practicing what I preach? I have made mini steps along the way (composting, buying less packaged materials, using less, paying by bag for garbage colllection which guarantees you will start thinking about what you throw away.)
- Each step leads to the next one. It is easy to be paralyzed with what is next. After my divorce that was big on my mind. What if the step I was about to take is the wrong one? What if I really screw this up? I remember my family Dr. at the time telling me this gem. It really doesn’t matter if it is the right or wrong step. What is important is that it is a step. That step may not lead where you think it is going, but standing still is not an option for a real future. As I was cleaning out my Google Drive recently, I came across a document I wrote after my separation. I answered how I was part of what happened, my fears, my dreams, etc. Travel and extending myself was front and center in the document. I had forgotten about it.
- To make a change you need a change in mindset first. What do I need to let go of? Change is hard without the mindset and putting your goals first. Changing your mind and then changing your practice will result in not wanting to go back to what was. Anyone who just starts making a change without the change in mindset first find that it is difficult to continue the change. This article (again from No Sidebar) that I just read this morning sums it up: each step is designed to lead to a specific goal and by doing so it changes me and leads me towards another path. What can I now do, now that I have less to divert my attention?
- The more stuff you have, the less you remember what you have.
- If you were to leave right now, what would you bring with you?
One person I read is Coutney Carver from Be More With Less. Her post on A Toast to the Tiny Steps is what I try to tell people all the time when they tell me: “I can’t exercise like you” or “I can’t do what you do in the morning”. I couldn’t either when I started. But I had a goal and I worked until it became routine. Each big change in our life is a series of tiny steps that get us there. Being consistent and even scheduling the little steps until they become a habit can help with meeting the little goals. Just being motivated or getting a reward doesn’t work in the long run. Setting an intention: What you want to do, when/what time you will do it. Without a plan, life gets in the way. I am not a pro, not like my daughter and her boxing, but I am intentional and have a plan.
Where am I now? The end goal is to experience a different culture(s). Now that the background documents are done, I have now sent for my work visa. I also purchased the tickets for my children to visit me over Christmas and applied for their visas too!
Another goal that I have had is to live more lightly. Over the years I have bought less (I have had a few setbacks there though) and sold a bunch of belongings. In the process I have felt lighter and unconstrained. As I start deciding what I really need to pack and take with me, I’m torn deciding how much is enough. Do I really need all my clothes (what do I still hold on to that is not necessary? What household goods do I really need when I am given a furnished apartment? There are many gadgets that I have right now still that can be accomplished more simply with a tool I would already have. Since I have a list of the contents of the apartment, I am looking still to bring as little as possible.)
There have been many articles through the years, most notably from Joshua Becker who has also introduced me to other voices such as No sidebar. This recent post, summarizes what I have felt through this process.
I’m really looking at starting over later with as little as possible and my move to that has been shaped by reading several articles. A recent one: I had the picture perfect, unhappy life speaks volumes of what life was like before my divorce. Not 100% what she wrote but close. I owe it to myself to see beyond material things and focus on using and acquiring less. Who knows where those steps will lead me…